Jokes and Humor

I witnessed a robbery in a fabric factory and immediately called the police. They caught the culprit and held me as a material witness.

Following the assault of a young woman, the police rounded up the usual suspects for a lineup.
Suddenly, the Polish suspect stepped forward and screamed "That's her!!"

How do men exercise at the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.

Your Momma so ugly, when she go to the beach the tide don't come in!

How did the sand get wet?
The sea weed!

There was the pillow and mattress manufacturing company that had a problem with staff...
Some of them just fell down all the time, and the rest were sleeping on the job.

A girl criticized my apartment so I knocked her flat.

What's the difference between a road-killed deer and a road-killed lawyer?
There's skid marks in front of the deer!


Murder
A police detective was investigating a homicide. As he questioned the on-scene officer, he learned the body was that of a young woman. The body was found with a bowl over her head and a spoon stuck in her back.

The on-scene officer asked what the detective thought had happened to the woman.

The detective responded,"I think it's obvious.
A cereal killer got her!"

Riddle of the Day

What is heavier in warm weather than in cold weather?



(Answer: the traffic to the beach.)